i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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