Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize