so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
