i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Randomize
