Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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