no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
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