You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize