Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
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