i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
We had sex on a dog bed..
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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