All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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