I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
