Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I had to cum in my sink.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
