does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
