how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
