i just had sex bonerless
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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