Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
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