Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
