Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
