i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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