What a fucking waste of an outfit
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
