i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
