I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
