I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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