you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
