Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
