It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I have post one night stand depression
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
