I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
