god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
