Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I love having hate sex.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
