Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
It was like getting head from an anaconda
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
