Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
