You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Help me help you realize you are a moron
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize