Dual....:-)
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
