I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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