So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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