Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
