...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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