Say something about gay babies.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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