my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
