is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
