If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
40s are totally the cure
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
