Hey man sorry I got all grabby
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
