they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize