Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
