what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
