they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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