I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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