she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
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