so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
