I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize