Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
